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My First World Fantasy
mood: 
content
contentChris and I talked all through lunch at this cute little coffee place, took a walk through a park full of the fattest squirrells ever and ended up in an ancient museum where he'd hung out as a little boy. Chris helped me practice my 'elevator pitch' just in case I'd have the opportunity to discuss my novel with an agent or editor, and we just laughed and talked and had an awesome time all around. By the time I hugged him goodbye, the terror had eased a bit.
It was back in full force Thursday afternoon while I stood in line to pick up my badge though. I half expected someone to say "excuse me, but what the hell do you think you're doing here?" but instead, Howard recognized me immediately, shook my hand and said he was glad to see me. All of a sudden, things came into prospective and I realized something. Every single author, editor, agent, bookseller and artist at that convention had been a nobody once, just like me. Who the hell was I to assume they wouldn't want another beginner around? What if they all loved hanging with aspiring authors like me? What if they wanted to share their wisdom with others behind them? What kind of person was I to think success had gone to their heads and turned them into some strange, unapproachable amalgamation?
By the time I'd recieved my badge and begun the impossible struggle to hook the little string to the little holes so I could fasten it around my neck, the terror was completely gone. I laughed with a tall, beautiful lady who wore a purple streak in her hair and purple crocks. I loved her for those two things and for the sparkle of humor in her eyes. Later, I learned she was difrancis, and damn. I wanna be just like her when I grow up!
Things went uphill from there. I sat and talked with two gentlemen who had been attending WFC since before I was born. After a time, one of them asked me if he could interview me on Sunday for the article he was writing about this WFC. Of course I said yes. Then, I went into the dealer's room and met so many amazing people I cannot even begin to remember all their names. I'll remember faces though and I can't wait to see all of them again!
tltrent, (aka Tiffany) enveloped me in a big soft hug and I knew then that I was going to have a wonderful time. Tiffany makes me feel very safe and content. I don't know why, but I dig that feeling and all weekend, whenever I felt a little overwhelmed or exhuasted, I'd go find her and sit beside her for a bit. We didn't need to talk, I just soaked up that calm safe feeling until I felt grounded and ready to enter the fray again.
antonstrout, arrived later Thursday afternoon and he's even cuter and funnier in person. Hard to believe I know, but it's true! I adore that boy and whether he cares to admit it or not, he's got a heart of solid gold. Anton, Tiffany, Jackie Kessler and I went to the bar for drinks then and we had SO much fun! Jackie is even shorter than I am and the girl ROCKS! Tiffany is more fun than I'd ever imagined a teacher could be and by the time we'd found our seats for the first panel, my face was sore from laughing.
After the panel, we ran into kelly_swails, and her hubby krswails, We all went out for dinner. Then we went to all these parties along with Jeremy and John and a bunch of other awesome people. We laughed so much at pbray, (aka Patricia Bray's) party my stomach started to ache. So, I took my lizard back to my hotel room and tried to get some sleep.
Me and Kelly at Patricia Bray's party.
Me and Tiffany in the art room.
Friday, I had an amazing talk with Tiffany that left me encouraged and confident. The girl has a special talent for nurturing the people around her and I admire that so much! Then, I got to talk to Dona Boyd (aka an author I worship whose books I have read and re-read many many times) and she sat down with me, showed me pictures of her new covers and made me so happy I totally lost the ability to speak. That is rare BTW. Cuz I NEVER run out of stuff to say!
I got to meet and hang out with buymeaclue, who makes people feel comfortable when she's around cuz she's so real and honest and ccfinlay, and raecarson,( a very hadsome couple IMO...they could totally model for magazine covers and stuff) and quikthnkr, and stevenagy,(who gives the best hugs ever) and melissajm,(who brought homeade cookies) and tons of other people whose names I'm not so good at but I know your faces!!!!
Then eeknight, and chats_noirs, arrived(aka people I adore and have been stalking for months now) and the rest of the day went by in a blur. I got to meet Liz Scheier and Gene Wolf and so many many other people I've only worshipped from afar.
Me and Eric
Eric is the reason I attended WFC this year and I will never be able to thank him enough for encouraging me to go. Never. He's SUCH an inspiration to a baby writer like me and when his Age of Fire books hit the big screen, I am SO going to say "I told you so!" Cuz they will. It's only a matter of time.
Anyway, Eric invited me to attend an Orbitz party with him and Steph and Howard where I got to meet John Silbersack and Ginger Clark and Donald Maas and this guy who writes about elves and revenge and has a compass in his head and these two girls who decided to help me kill the seven-foot-tall guy who won the prize we wanted.
After the party, Eric, Steph, Howard and I went to this little Indian place for a quiet dinner which was exactly what we needed. I tell you what LJ Land peeps. If you ever have an opportunity to hang with those three, take advantage of it immediatly. They are made of awesome.
Later that night, I got to sit and just talk with Pat Rothfuss, Anton, Tiffany and a couple other buddies we'd made at the con. We talked for hours about nothing and everything and that was one of my most favorite parts of the whole con becuase that's when I knew I'd found where I belonged. I realized that night, that this whole writing thing is not some process we must endure in order to reach some ideal or prize at the end. It's a journey that NEVER ends. A process thats different for ever single person who loves stories and dares to share them. It's a career choice thats full of tears and triumph and it's a thing of beauty because it forces us to face our biggest weaknesses. I dig that.
Sunday, I got to sit down and chat with Tim Powers for a while and let me tell you somethign LJ Land peeps. That man is wonderful. He taught me more in the space of twenty minutes than I'd imagined possible and I felt like I could just chat with him for hours and never tire of it. Ever.
Then, Rachel Vincent (aka the author of STRAY which I loved) invited me to have lunch with her and that made me SO happy! Rachel is made of awesome too. She really is. We both decided the whole con would have been even better if our beloved Jeaniene Frost had been there.
Then, I got to sit and chat with Pat Rothfuss and Jennifer Dunne (who has the cutest giggle EVER) and Jill and jpsorrow, for a couple more hours. They are my kind of people!
I chose a career as an author two years ago now and I've worked my ass off almost every single day since to make that choice a reality. There is no doubt in my mind now that I made the right decision. Am I where I want to be yet? No. Am I closer than I was two years ago? YES! I know I have so many many more disappointements to survive, victories to celebrate and lessons to learn, but I dig that!
Even if these agents ALL reject my manuscript and send me back to the drawing board, I will know I made the right decision and I will start over and write a better book because I KNOW I can do it! And when I finally mange to sell a book, I will write a better one and then a better one after that and I will keep writing and improving and suffering and celebrating untill I tire of it or die.
I would encourage all my baby writer friends to attend a conference like this as soon as you can because you'll know then whether or not this is the world for you. I don't know why, or how it works, but it does!
It was back in full force Thursday afternoon while I stood in line to pick up my badge though. I half expected someone to say "excuse me, but what the hell do you think you're doing here?" but instead, Howard recognized me immediately, shook my hand and said he was glad to see me. All of a sudden, things came into prospective and I realized something. Every single author, editor, agent, bookseller and artist at that convention had been a nobody once, just like me. Who the hell was I to assume they wouldn't want another beginner around? What if they all loved hanging with aspiring authors like me? What if they wanted to share their wisdom with others behind them? What kind of person was I to think success had gone to their heads and turned them into some strange, unapproachable amalgamation?
By the time I'd recieved my badge and begun the impossible struggle to hook the little string to the little holes so I could fasten it around my neck, the terror was completely gone. I laughed with a tall, beautiful lady who wore a purple streak in her hair and purple crocks. I loved her for those two things and for the sparkle of humor in her eyes. Later, I learned she was difrancis, and damn. I wanna be just like her when I grow up!
Things went uphill from there. I sat and talked with two gentlemen who had been attending WFC since before I was born. After a time, one of them asked me if he could interview me on Sunday for the article he was writing about this WFC. Of course I said yes. Then, I went into the dealer's room and met so many amazing people I cannot even begin to remember all their names. I'll remember faces though and I can't wait to see all of them again!
tltrent, (aka Tiffany) enveloped me in a big soft hug and I knew then that I was going to have a wonderful time. Tiffany makes me feel very safe and content. I don't know why, but I dig that feeling and all weekend, whenever I felt a little overwhelmed or exhuasted, I'd go find her and sit beside her for a bit. We didn't need to talk, I just soaked up that calm safe feeling until I felt grounded and ready to enter the fray again.
antonstrout, arrived later Thursday afternoon and he's even cuter and funnier in person. Hard to believe I know, but it's true! I adore that boy and whether he cares to admit it or not, he's got a heart of solid gold. Anton, Tiffany, Jackie Kessler and I went to the bar for drinks then and we had SO much fun! Jackie is even shorter than I am and the girl ROCKS! Tiffany is more fun than I'd ever imagined a teacher could be and by the time we'd found our seats for the first panel, my face was sore from laughing.
After the panel, we ran into kelly_swails, and her hubby krswails, We all went out for dinner. Then we went to all these parties along with Jeremy and John and a bunch of other awesome people. We laughed so much at pbray, (aka Patricia Bray's) party my stomach started to ache. So, I took my lizard back to my hotel room and tried to get some sleep.
Me and Kelly at Patricia Bray's party.
Me and Tiffany in the art room.
Friday, I had an amazing talk with Tiffany that left me encouraged and confident. The girl has a special talent for nurturing the people around her and I admire that so much! Then, I got to talk to Dona Boyd (aka an author I worship whose books I have read and re-read many many times) and she sat down with me, showed me pictures of her new covers and made me so happy I totally lost the ability to speak. That is rare BTW. Cuz I NEVER run out of stuff to say!
I got to meet and hang out with buymeaclue, who makes people feel comfortable when she's around cuz she's so real and honest and ccfinlay, and raecarson,( a very hadsome couple IMO...they could totally model for magazine covers and stuff) and quikthnkr, and stevenagy,(who gives the best hugs ever) and melissajm,(who brought homeade cookies) and tons of other people whose names I'm not so good at but I know your faces!!!!
Then eeknight, and chats_noirs, arrived(aka people I adore and have been stalking for months now) and the rest of the day went by in a blur. I got to meet Liz Scheier and Gene Wolf and so many many other people I've only worshipped from afar.
Me and Eric
Eric is the reason I attended WFC this year and I will never be able to thank him enough for encouraging me to go. Never. He's SUCH an inspiration to a baby writer like me and when his Age of Fire books hit the big screen, I am SO going to say "I told you so!" Cuz they will. It's only a matter of time.
Anyway, Eric invited me to attend an Orbitz party with him and Steph and Howard where I got to meet John Silbersack and Ginger Clark and Donald Maas and this guy who writes about elves and revenge and has a compass in his head and these two girls who decided to help me kill the seven-foot-tall guy who won the prize we wanted.
After the party, Eric, Steph, Howard and I went to this little Indian place for a quiet dinner which was exactly what we needed. I tell you what LJ Land peeps. If you ever have an opportunity to hang with those three, take advantage of it immediatly. They are made of awesome.
Later that night, I got to sit and just talk with Pat Rothfuss, Anton, Tiffany and a couple other buddies we'd made at the con. We talked for hours about nothing and everything and that was one of my most favorite parts of the whole con becuase that's when I knew I'd found where I belonged. I realized that night, that this whole writing thing is not some process we must endure in order to reach some ideal or prize at the end. It's a journey that NEVER ends. A process thats different for ever single person who loves stories and dares to share them. It's a career choice thats full of tears and triumph and it's a thing of beauty because it forces us to face our biggest weaknesses. I dig that.
Sunday, I got to sit down and chat with Tim Powers for a while and let me tell you somethign LJ Land peeps. That man is wonderful. He taught me more in the space of twenty minutes than I'd imagined possible and I felt like I could just chat with him for hours and never tire of it. Ever.
Then, Rachel Vincent (aka the author of STRAY which I loved) invited me to have lunch with her and that made me SO happy! Rachel is made of awesome too. She really is. We both decided the whole con would have been even better if our beloved Jeaniene Frost had been there.
Then, I got to sit and chat with Pat Rothfuss and Jennifer Dunne (who has the cutest giggle EVER) and Jill and jpsorrow, for a couple more hours. They are my kind of people!
I chose a career as an author two years ago now and I've worked my ass off almost every single day since to make that choice a reality. There is no doubt in my mind now that I made the right decision. Am I where I want to be yet? No. Am I closer than I was two years ago? YES! I know I have so many many more disappointements to survive, victories to celebrate and lessons to learn, but I dig that!
Even if these agents ALL reject my manuscript and send me back to the drawing board, I will know I made the right decision and I will start over and write a better book because I KNOW I can do it! And when I finally mange to sell a book, I will write a better one and then a better one after that and I will keep writing and improving and suffering and celebrating untill I tire of it or die.
I would encourage all my baby writer friends to attend a conference like this as soon as you can because you'll know then whether or not this is the world for you. I don't know why, or how it works, but it does!
Indeed. :)
I'm glad that worked so well for you. I had a similar experience at Wiscon last year linked here:
http://cathschaffstump.livejournal.c
That sort of kicked me back into gear.
***
I also appreciate your stance and philosophy. We just keep at it until they take us in. 'Cause we're doing it anyway.
Thanks for sharing.
Catherine
*hugs*
One of the best things about the specfic world is the "pay it forward" ethic. It's nice to see it appreciated by the next generation.
It's all such a blur...
Di
xo
People is people.
Just remember what E.E.Knight said above: pay it forward.
Maybe one day you'll be that grizzled veteran published author at a con... remember the feeling of your first big con and understand the responsibility of fandom..."pay it forward" to the next bright-eyed and shiny pre-published author. ;)
I was there, but still...
Wow.
You rock! How could they not!
(((hugs)))
And I can hardly wait to see your books in print! Soon!
What makes it all even better is knowing one day that you're going to be able to make a "baby writer" feel that way, too. Just think--next year or the one after, people will be blogging "OMG! I got to meet Rhona Westbrook!"